FROM THE DESK OF TFG1MIKE! – Being a Single Geek Vs Being in a Geeky Relationship
FROM THE DESK OF TFG1MIKE!
TFG1Mike here, and welcome to my NEW personal type blog here on The GCRN. I struggled in whether or not to even do this. I’m still gonna keep it geeky, but I figured getting a bit more personal might be a nice touch. I’m going to be focusing on positive type stuff I see in the world. So today I present to you….
The Geeky Single Life Vs Being in a Geeky Relationship
I’ve been single most of my adult life. Mostly by choice, sometimes by circumstances beyond my control. I grew up in the 80s, born in 1980… so I knew the times BEFORE internet dating. If you liked a girl you call her up, talk, ask her out. I know online dating has been around a long ass time, and Match dot-com started in 1995, but I didn’t find internet dating till about 1998-1999. I grew up in the era of passing notes in class, of writing letters back and forth, and to many of our parents dismay all night phone calls. TODAY though….. it has to be harder than it was 20 or 30 years ago. Because you’ve got snapchat, grindr, tinder, etc etc etc….. not to mention all the website stuff like eHarmony, perfect match… and on and on. I’d tried them all, and they all failed. Thankfully with the mobile dating scene these days I’m VERY Happy I was not into the online dating. It’s all too trivial, teenagerish, and complicated!
Hell back in the 1980s and I’m sure before then, but that’s MY DECADE so I’ll be referencing that the most. Back then even admitting you were a geek or a nerd was a horrible move to make. Ya see kids, back in my day….. geek, nerd, etc were insults to those that weren’t the sports guys or the cheerleaders. All the unpopular people were just lumped into one massive category. Hell I remember getting in trouble in the 4th Grade by my teacher for writing in my journal that I was gonna listen to Hard Rock music, and call a girl I liked! AND THAT WAS THE 1980s!!! Â However in this day and age we now have the DAWN OF THE GEEKS!! Where Geek Culture has permeated into the mainstream of pop culture so much, that it’s hard to see the lines that used to be drawn.
GEEKY SINGLE LIFE
To be geeky and single, in this day and age it’s easy. With all the tech we have now, there are many ways to get your geek on. Whether that be iDevices, Androids, etc. Or going to the movies, binge watching TV shows on Netflix and Hulu. Hell even going to weekend long Conventions….. There are many ways a geek who is single can still love life to the fullest! Now being a Geek and being single isn’t the end of the world. There are a lot of advantages to this. You don’t have to share a bathroom with someone, you can buy whatever you want (as long as you are responsible about it), you have all the time in the world to devote to the things you love the most. From 1999 to 2001 I was in a brief online relationship, that became real life from December 2000 to March 2001. Then again from May to June 2003. She and I had a lot in common and we talked about everything. I’m honestly not sure WHERE it went wrong the first or second time. However I reflect on the good times we had. Looking back at that time in my life, and comparing it to from about 2004 to 2015… Wow online dating and relationships have changed in 17 years. However I’ll talk about that more in a bit. So 2004 was the last time I went on a date until Jennifer and I started a long distance relationship online last year. Between returning from Mississippi to Kentucky in 2003 and whenÂ I decided to stop being in the dating scene in 2004. I was looking for something unattainable. I was looking for that fairytale ending. Very rarely does anyone get that “happily ever after” The problem I had been constantly looking for it, and not finding it. So I just stopped all together. I dove into the job I got in January 2005, which was a live in resident position at a local group home here in Louisville KY. I had that job for five years from 2005 to 2010, and I loved doing it. I had worked nights at an apartment complex handling the overnight stuff, and anything while the supervisors and case managers were not there. This meant I had my days free to do whatever I wanted. As long as I was back by 6pm each night, I could go off and do whatever I wanted. Being a single geek and having THAT kinda freedom with a job was epic!! As the single geek I watched whatever movies, cartoons, or TV shows I wanted. I spent money on things I wanted, as well as being responsible and taking care of the few bills I had. See my “single” geek life from 2005-210 was very unique. As a live in resident for this group home I got free rent, electric, free everything with this apartment. Even cable was included, so the only bill I had wasÂ my cell phone bill. Looking back on that time in my life I wish I’d taken a lot of the money I was paid by the job and squirreled it away. But there’s nothing I can do to change the past. The point is that being single and geek was so easy.
The sad part about being a geeky single is seeing all your friends who are in relationships or married, being able to share their interests with the person they love. So while I could still have all the fun in the world that I wanted with my geeky interests and friends. Still it felt like there was something, someone missing. That special someone to share my geeky life with. See the photo below…. while I can laugh at that for a solid ten minutes by myself, it’d be even funnier sharing it with the woman of my dreams. And so let’s get into “Being in a Geeky Relationship!”
BEING IN A GEEKY RELATIONSHIP
As of June 27, 2016… I’ve been in a long distance, online relationship. That will become a real life relationship in September this year. The cool thing with being in a relationship with someone online these days… is ALLÂ the technology we have at our disposal. Like Skype video chat and all that jazz. We can watch movies together even though we aren’t in the same room. The goal obviously is that Jen and I will be in the same room full-time eventually.
So here’s the thing I’ve noticed between being a single geek to being in a geeky relationship or a married geek… I believe it makes us better people if we have someone we love to share our passions with. Before Jen… I didn’t give Gravity Falls the time of day, oh sure I saw an episode here or there, and the ads all the time. However I’m not that into spooky supernatural type stuff. BUT because Jen loved it, it piqued my interest in checking it out… to see what was so special about it that she loved so much. I still have yet to see Gravity Falls Season 2, but after watching Season 1 I really like the show. So I have turned Jen onto The 7D and she fell in love with Grim and Hildy The Glooms! So ya see SHARING your favorite things with your favorite person in the world has its advantages. There are so many things that one or the other of us has not seen or heard of yet, and that’s the beauty of it, we can create a life together through our geeky interests. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again Jen is the only person who could ever get me to watch or experience something I’d never thought I’d ever watch or experience. I’m sure it goes the other way with her as well. Hell just last week I showed her Transformers The Movie (TFTM 1986), and while she’s not the biggest TF fangirl at all… she at least enjoyed watching th film. WHY you might ask, well I think it’s because we were watching it together and she was getting a glimpse into my soul, of the geeky stuff I love. Now NOT all you and your partners’ interests will be the same, and THAT IS OK! That just makes the two of you a unique match. Because it drives you both to be involved in each other’s lives. Getting to know your soulmate through their interests is a fun thing!! You may be reading this, and asking… “But TFG1Mike HOW do I find the right woman, man, whatever… for me?” Well all I can tell you is whomever you have feelings for START AS FRIENDS FIRST, then find something that the other loves and surprise them with something SPECIAL! That’s how I won Jen’s heart, for her birthday last year I did something extra special!! No I’m not gonna tell you what it is, but if you’ve listened to any of my podcasts you’ve most likely heard me there say what it was. That’s the key once you find someone you hold onto them forever, and the life you create together will be the most amazing life experience!
GEEKY SINGLE LIFE VS GEEKY RELATIONSHIP LIFE
There is no right or wrong answer here. No clear-cut winner, and there was never meant to be. I wrote this more as a comparison piece than a versus battle. I was happy living the Geeky Single Life, but being in a Geeky Relationship… just makes life so much better. At least that’s my personal opinion. Because with my Jennifer… my geeky life is complete.
There ya have it folks… the third blog in my FROM THE DESK OF TFG1MIKE series. Join me next time when I’ll be writing and talking about….. FOR THE LOVE OF ART! Until then I’m gonna transform and roll on outta here.